Breaking up is an unavoidable part of life. It is one of the hardest things you can do because of the emotions involved. If you’re ready to end a relationship, consider how you can break up without conflict. The both of you had feelings for each other at one point, and maybe you still do. The key is to do it maturely, without deliberate pain, so that you can both move on with your lives and find someone better suited for you. A relationship really needs two fully committed people, so if one of you doesn’t want to be in the relationship anymore, it’s best for both of you to end it.
If you are simply upset with your partner, you should consider talking about it with your partner and focus on resolving it, rather than ending the relationship. But if this same issue has already been discussed, yet nothing changes and you still keep feeling unsatisfied, hurt, or betrayed, then breaking up might be the only way to end the pattern. Your partner might ask you why, and you should be prepared with answers. Do your best to explain the reasons you are breaking up. If you have trouble remembering examples during emotional discussions or arguments, write your reasons down in advance.
Remember to break up with them in person. It may seem easier to break up with someone if you don’t have to look the person in the eye, but it can also be interpreted as cruel and cowardly. Unless you are a long distance away and choose not to wait until you see the person again, don’t break up using communication devices like phones or via e-mail or even through instant messaging. Also, don’t break up with someone by dissapearing from their life. The lack of closure can be psychologically damaging.
After the break-up talk, you must be prepared for your now ex-partner’s reaction. Answer any question honestly when they ask for the reasons. They may become upset and cry or they will try to argue. When this happens you can try to reason or comfort them but don’t let them manipulate your decision. He or she may offer to change, or to do things differently in order to preserve the relationship. If the person didn’t change when you’ve discussed your problems in the past, it is too late to expect him or her to truly change now.
Distance yourself for a while. It’ll be difficult, but don’t call them and don’t go places where you know they frequent,. Take the time to reflect on your situation and learn more about yourself. Do all the things you’ve ever wanted to do, that you wouldn’t have done if you were still with this person. Now is the perfect time to focus on those missed opportunities. Your ex may try to get in touch, but wait a while before resuming contact. You felt close to this person at one point in your life, and you will probably always have a soft spot for him or her, but it’s time for both of you to move on.
Always remember that breaking up is a normal part of life. We all survive it.
