Interacting with a shy person may seem hard and may make other non-shy people wonder if they’ll be able to carry on a conversation with them. It can be hard to get to know a shy person, even their feelings and intentions regarding dating and relationships. They may be even be too leery when it comes to dating. It takes a lot of patience and understanding to help you date and get to know a shy person. You have to help him out of their shell in order for you know him well enough to have a comfortable and fulfilling relationship. Here are some ideas and tips on how to do just that.

* Get to know them as a friend. Show interest in learning more about them and gauge their willingness to open up when determining the direction of your relationship.
Talk to him when you’re alone rather than surrounded by people, since being in a crowd may intimidate them. Make them comfortable with you as a friend, with no pressure or insinuation of anything else. Remember to listen very well when they are speaking.

* Show them that you can be trusted. Tell them about yourself. Since you’re divulging a few of your secrets, you are showing them that you can be trusted. Remember to keep whatever they tells you a secret. If you break their trust, they may never trust you again.

* Ask questions about things they seem to be interested in. It is often most easy and comfortable for a shy person to discuss things they are passionate about. Let him participate at his own pace and try not to force him to open up to you too soon.

* Go on dates where there will be just the two of you. Don’t create pressure by making it formal. Just say that you’d love to spend time with them. Choose dates where you won’t have to talk much. Going to a movie where you won’t have to talk much will help him ease into the relationship rather than being in a long, silent dinner.

* Be reliable and trustworthy. These are important traits for her to accept your friendship and if she is to consider a romantic relationship with you.

Remember: Do not ask them why they are so shy. This makes a shy person uncomfortable and won’t help you to draw him out of his shell for you to know him better.

Communication is one of the main ingredients to a beautiful and healthy relationship.One of the factors of keeping a relationship alive is communication. Both on the receiving and giving side. Although sometimes it my be hard, communication is the only way of imparting information regarding your opinion, feelings, and thoughts across by way of speech, writing, or signs, feelings, beliefs, critiques and other comments with another person. Without having such an exchange, a relationship will live in silence and soon drown in that silence, until there is no longer any kind of connection between the two of you. This is one of the biggest reasons a relationship ends and also a reason why some are lead to making bad decisions.

Communication is something we all know is necessary to keep any relationship strong,loving and alive, and although we are aware of the importance of communication, we still seem to be clueless about what exactly good communication really is. This does not mean you are clueless as a person, but it does mean that more attention is required on your part, so that you can become more open and invite the many forms of communication that exist, so that you will be able to understand yourself and your partner much better. There is nothing that keeps a relationship healthy, better than understanding and once you start becoming more familiar with your communicating styles, as well as your partners, you will be able to work better as a team in making the best of your relationship.

The first step in achieving better communication that will really work, is to take a look at “Yourself” first. People always tend to turn to their partner first when things are not running so smoothly in their relationship. They automatically start pointing out what their partner is doing or not doing, as well as how their partner is not listening to them. This may all be true depending on your particular situation, but it is important that you take the responsibility in reviewing your own actions and communication first, before you can point anything out to your partner. Remember, it is very easy to see other people’s mistakes, but when it comes to looking at ourselves, it is much harder to accept criticism, even from yourself- because no one wants to be wrong. This is where you need to get real about things. Communication is not about who is right or wrong, but instead about helping each other see things from each other’s perspective, so that you can be on the page and avoid any misunderstanding that will cause unneeded arguments.

Good communication is not just about being able to talk, but being able to listen. Listening is so important if you truly wish to accomplish good communication that will improve your relationship. Are you really listening to what your partner is saying to you, or are you eager to get things off you chest and make your points? Listening may sound like an easy enough thing to do, but many may confuse it with hearing. “Hearing what your partner is saying” versus “listening to your partner”, are indeed very different. Listening involves true dedication and your full attention to the words your partner is saying to you, as well as the tones and expressions that go along with those words. Listening means that you are interested in learning more about what your partner is making an effort to tell you and making the emotional connection needed in order to achieve your relationship goals together. Keep in mind that when you are in lationship, all communication between partners has to be open, honest, non-judgmental and patient, if you are to succeed and maintaining a happy and healthy relationship.Really listening to what your partner says may help you to get a better understanding of him or her as a person. It may also help you to come up with compromises that may work for the both of you. You may want to acknowledge what your partner says to show them that you care. Acknowledgment can be a nod of the head or saying something like ‘I understand why you’d feel that way.’ Showing that you’re listening to your partner may help him or her really express his or her feelings. It may also increase the level of trust you and your partner share.

Get winning out of your mind. So many couples claim that they have tried communication, but it does not seem to work. If this is your case, then the best thing would be to slow down, calm down and take a few steps back. Perhaps communication is not working for your relationship, but what method of communication are you using? You see, communication itself cannot be the problem or the ineffective ingredient, because communication is the main key to a healthy relationship, so it must be the way you and your partner are communicating. When you or your partner talks to each other, do one or both of you talk to win the conversation, or to actually reach a level of understanding of each other’s needs and wants? Believe it or not, it is very common for people to focus on being right and trying to convince their partner of seeing things their way, instead of just sharing what they think and feel so their partner can understand what they mean and what they need.

Communication is not that complicated if you just really understand what the right way of communicating is, and of course- what methods of communication works for you and your communication best. Effective communication cannot happen on it’s own with the effort of only one person. Both you and your partner should have to be open and willing to work as a team on improving the way you communicate, so that you both can enhance your relationship skills and build a relationship where you both will have an understanding—understanding for who you are as individuals and what both of you need and want. Just remember to stay real with yourself and avoid painting a foggy and falsified picture- so that you will never be caught off guard with nay-painful surprises or stressful misunderstandings.

Dating can be confusing even if you are seasoned veteran. It is hard to determine whether you or your date should pay for the date or if the two of you will split the bill. First dates usually end in two different ways. Either you want to see them again or you stop dating them. The anxiety of what to do after the first date can be racing through the dater’s mind. But what is more confusing is not necessarily the question determining whether to call or not or not even the query of who calls first but it is when do you call them and how to call them. Knowing how to call your potential love interest after a first date is not as difficult as you might think. Here are tips on how to call someone after a first date.

* Wait two days before calling. Calling too soon would give an impression that you are overly keen and calling too late might make your date think that you are insincere or aren’t interested. Tell them that you had a wonderful time then leave the option open for another date to follow.

* Know what to say. Try not to be nervous. Do not let your nerves overpower you when talking to your date. There is nothing worse than an awkward silence during a telephone conversation. Try practicing what you are going to say beforehand.

* Prolonged first call conversation is a big no-no. Chatting for too long can make you appear needy. Keep the chat short and simple. You’ll have a lot of time talking on the phone after the second or third date.

* Do not leave too many messages on their answering machine. Try leaving your message (together with your phone number) only once. If you are getting repeated messages from your date’s answering machine, chances are the feelings between each other are not mutual. Your date would call they are likewise interested.

* Avoid calling too often. This can make you look clingy and being cling or needy is very unattractive since it shows signs on insecurity.

Bonus tip: Try sending a text message or an e-mail to thank them instead of calling. They will appreciate it. Also, remember to keep it short and sweet.

“I lied to her because I knew she’d be mad if I told the truth.”

This is one example of a man explaining his reason for being dishonest with his spouse.

This may be #1 on the list of ‘bad deals’ that we make in relationships. In theory, if the lie is never found out, there’s no problem. In fact, the liar often feels that it’s a smart move, as it avoids a conflict. (The reality, though, is that you’ve got the issue of your own integrity to wrestle with.).

In practice, the lie often can be found out, and there are now two problems to deal with:

1. The conflict you were trying to avoid through the lie is now there to be dealt with.
2. You’ve just created a trust issue in your relationship.

Lack of trust is incredibly toxic in a relationship. When there is no trust, intimacy decreases, and control increases – not the right recipe for a successful relationship. One person told me that: “Trust is more important than love.”And for what I have experience with couples, I’d say this is true. If the trust in your relationship is damaged, just about everything else is affected.

Honesty is at the very core of great relationships. Without it, couples will do nothing more than limp along. But those that adhere to absolute trust and truthfulness are free to gallop ahead at full stride.

There are three levels of truth-telling:

@The first is the verbal level@

Lies represent verbal violations that have a powerfully negative impact on trust. If a woman covers her lack of punctuality by insisting “traffic was terrible,” damage is done to the relationship. If a man says he didn’t stop on the way home for a drink, but he did, there will be a price to pay. Obviously, the more serious the infraction, the greater the tax on the relationship.

@Second, truth is crucial on the behavioral level.@

Both partners need to follow through on what they say. Words must be backed up by actions. If you promise to show up for an appointment on time, you should be there on time. If you say you’ll send a thank you note to friends who had you over for dinner, you need to do it. Maintaining behavioral integrity contributes deeply to the building of a secure relationship.

@Finally, it’s important to be truthful on the “being” level@
This level may never get talked about, but it will be vital to the health of the developing relationship. For instance, if a marriage partner pursues inner health, that person will be making a crucial “being” contribution. But when that person gets pressured to be something he or she is not, the relationship is sure to suffer.

Personal decisions that are made out of timidity or coercion represent a surrender of one’s integrity and commitment to a false self. But those actions and attitudes that emanate from authentic parts of yourself fortify the relationship.

Want a fantastic relationship? Maximize the trust factor by being completely honest each and every time the need arises. Tell the truth, behave the truth, and be the truth. Under these conditions, a relationship is sure to thrive and flourish.

As tough as dating can be, the toughest task of all may be at the beginning when you are trying to tell if a girl really likes you or not. Is she really flirting or brushing you off?
Women, no doubt, often seem like a big mystery. Whether they are serious, flirting, or just playing games, it is hard to tell because all women aren’t the same. Despite the fact that thousands of research papers about human behavior have been published, no one can confidently claim to say a girl likes him – Nick Marshall (Mel Gibson in What Women Want) excluded. These kind of people are indeed nonexistent. No matter how many times she smiles, flutters her eyelashes, or plays with her hair, the only way you can be sure that she really likes you, is until she says so herself.

However, women do provide some clues about what’s going on in their mind. These clues can be in the form conversation, body language and etc. So, don’t get stuck in the ’she loves me’ or ’she loves me not’ phase, learn how to decipher the cryptic hints she provides. Here are a few ways to help you get started.

*Watch Her Body Language. An interested girl may lean close when speaking to you. She may smile when you look at her. Notice if she touches you often, just brushing your arm or touching your shoulder.If she crossed her legs when sitting down. If the front foot is pointed or rocking towards you, it’s a sign she wants to get closer.Watch for hand gestures. Twirling her hair, playing with jewelry, rubbing her wrists and exposing her palms are all nervous signs of interest.Wait and see if she touches you in any way. That’s almost the number one sign she likes you.

If you have never paid attention to her body language, it would be wise to start doing that now. If she’s leaning close and smiling while talking to you, she’s genuinely interested. If she touches your arm or shoulder often, smiles when you look at her, and looks into your eyes when you speak to her, it’s a clear sign that she’s definitely interested. Also watch out for her hand gestures. She may twirl her hair, play with jewelry or other accessories, and rub her wrists, these are few nervous signs of interest. Remember that mostly body language clues are about physical attraction, rather than commitment and relationship but, there are always exceptions to the rule.

*Check for eye contact. If she looks directly at you and her pupils are dilated, she is definitely interested. Also, see if she blinks more than usual or flutters her eyelashes. She does her cat scan over you. You might notice that she looks at you at regular intervals and scans you from top to bottom to top again. So, dress well and do not slouch.

*The Conversation.

Observe the way she listens to you while you are speaking. Do her eyes wander somewhere else or are they focused on you? If she is interested in you, she will listen attentively to what you are saying. You cannot get to know a person until you start talking to them. The way you start a conversation is also important. Start the conversation with slight humor to lighten the mood. Remember, if you can make a woman laugh, half your battle is already won. If she talks a lot about you, or asks you many questions, she’s curious and wants to know more about you, and if she talks about herself – her interests, hobbies, friends and family – she probably wants you to get to know her better, before committing to a relationship.

*See if she talks more about herself or you. If she asks you a lot of questions, she wants to know as much about you as possible.

*Pay attention to her voice. It’s a good sign if she tries to match your tone by raising or lowering her voice or talking faster or slower.

*Watch for conversation about exes. If she asks about ex-girlfriends, she wants to know if she’s your type. If she talks a lot about ex-boyfriends, she’s probably not looking for a relationship now.

*Talk to her. You can’t get to know someone without talking to them and spending time together. If you want to know if she likes you, you must be neither overbearing nor afraid of rejection; you have to know how to approach and talk to women for success in the dating world. Give the girl some of your own time and attention and she just may make her desires known.

*Notice how often she calls or texts you just to say good night. If you are friends and exchange text messages or phone calls, pay attention to when she contacts you. Does she only call when she’s bored or all her friends are out? Or does she call you just to say hello in the morning or wish you good night? If she calls because she is thinking of you, she’s interested. If she calls because she wants something, she may be playing a game or just looking for a friend when she’s alone.

*Watch her with her friends. Some girls behave differently when they are with their friends, for example, she may be comfortable when she’s alone with you, but, with her friends around, she may try to avoid you. You should look at the way her friends react when you pass by. If they glance at you smiling and giggling, it probably means that her friends know about you – a good sign. Or, when she’s having a conversation with her friends, and you pass by, she may stop talking, which means that you were probably the topic of conversation. It may also be that she’s just nervous in your presence. These are some signs that show she is interested in you, and wants to get to know you better.

*Invite her for coffee. Some girls just won’t make the first move. She might not flirt or ask you out but she will respond to an invitation. If the girl you desire says yes she definitely likes you, but it may just be as a friend. On your coffee date, go back to step three and talk to her. Listen to what she has to say.

*Tell her how you feel. Some girls want to know a guy is interested before they make up their own minds. It may not be fair for you to have to make the first move, but sometimes it happens. If you like her, let her know. If you think a girl likes you but you don’t return the feeling, let her know you aren’t interested and then give her the space to deal with it in her own way.

*She can’t look you in the eye. Another one of the signs she likes you is when she can’t look at you face-to-face for long. If she does manage it, see if she’s blushing or check for any signs of nervousness.
Unless you’re generally known as a terrifying person, her nervousness probably has something more to do with how fast her heart’s beating at that very moment. This is more obvious when you used to hang out with her all the time before she suddenly became shy around you.

*She asks you personal questions. When a woman likes a guy, she will naturally want to know more about him. So if a lady started asking you about your favorite colors and what you like to do in your spare time, she’s probably fancies you.

Some Other Clues

* To know more about you, she may start hanging around your friends
* She is always the first to congratulate you on your achievements, and is always there to support you
* You see her presence more often than usual
* She will never refuses when you ask her to have coffee or spend time with you
* She is always ready to help you every time you need
* She buys small gifts for you for no reason
* She asks about your prior relationships (she probably wants to know if you are single or not)
* She is comfortable around you and doesn’t need to pretend about anything
* She calls you in morning to say hello and wishes you goodnight before sleeping

These are a but a few signs which will let you know if a girl likes you or not. To understand these signs, you need to spend time with her and get to know her better. And once you know that she likes you, just love her ‘truly, madly, deeply’.

Learn to differentiate between a person with genuine interest and a person who just wants to make small conversation though.

Some signs she likes you can overlap with one another. However, don’t delude yourself into thinking she’s attracted to you based on just one experience. The only way you’ll get the hang of it is through a lot of careful observation. Put your analytical skills to good use and you might get the answer you’re looking for.